golfrewind.com

THE WINNER OF THE 2004 DARWIN AWARD

You all know about the Darwin Awards - Its an annual honor given to the person who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way. Here's this year's winner, a golfer:

Based on a bet by the other members of his golfing threesome, Everett
Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez
managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine.

Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank
on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in
the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch.

Unfortunately for Sanchez, the post of the ball washer was more than strong enough to support his body weight, and his sack was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was compressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside.

To add insult to injury, Sanchez then broke a new $300.00 graphite shaft
driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was attempting to
use as a cane. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome was asked to leave the course.

This last one wouldn't normally qualify, because the golfer didn't die. But
because he cannot reproduce as a result of his qualifying act of stupidity,
we have allowed it.

-The Darwin Awards Committee

Par,

What a story and what a dumbazz. Thanks for the laugh.

drstroud,

Thanks for setting the record straight. I've heard that one before too. Like some guy's tales of their golf exploits, this story "stretched" the truth just a bit too far!

The story was just too good to be true.

The image of some drunken idiot engaging in such a stupid act and suffering the consequences is appealing because we've all experienced playing behind a group of inebriated morons who make life miserable for everyone else on the course.