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Ok. At the risk of alienating some of the total purists in here, I want to hear..... err..... make that read ur funniest golf story. No holds barred. If it happened, let's see it. And please, no one bash anybody for their stories. This thread is for those who want to tell something funny or amazing, even if it goes against the ethics of golf. Were all human and sometimes that humanity maks us do crazy things. If your ready, I'll start it off.

So me and a few of my close friends are out on a public course in Clearwater FL. Our ages range from 25-35, but sometimes we act like 12 year olds :).

The course is playing really slow. There is a foursome ahead of us moving like crippled turtles. So as were standing on the tee box, we start to to practice swing with drivers hitting whatever is laying on the grass. Were hitting broken tees off the ground and someone decides to hit them at someone else. So now all four of us are spanking broken tees at each other. Not a big deal. But one of my idiot friends gets the grand idea of hitting a ball at me. I never saw it coming. BAM!! Right of my right shin!! Immediately a welt the size of a Coke can forms. And as often happens when a friend gets hurt in your presence, two of the guys fall over in laughter! But the guy who hit me is standing there dumbfounded. He is suddenly realizing what he has done. He knows now that he is in trouble. It's only a matter of time before I destroy him. This fear of the unknown eats at him as I struggle through the hole. On the next tee box.... without saying a word.... he inches himself in front of my already teed up Nike Mojo. The other two guys egg him on. Cameron decides he is going to take it now when he is prepared rather when he does not know its coming. I ask him if he is sure he wants to do this. He says "just do it". So I wind up..... and drive the ball right into his ankle! The other two guys fall over laughing!! Suddenly I don't feel the pain in my shin anymore but I fall to the ground laughing as well! Cameron says nothing. He limps across the tee box and sits in the cart. Moments later he starts to puke from the pain and says "I think you broke my ankle".

Fortunately this all happened on the 17 and 18 holes. Cameron and I stumble off to our cars where we take a photo of our bruises next to each other. It was hard to believ what happened and how we got there... but all four of us laughed at the ridiculousness of the whole situation! And none of us were drinking that day!

And yes we still all golf together. But we have a truce and an agreement.... no more hitting balls at each other.

Haha, Kids :D Gotta love it:P

I don't have funny story though.

The craziest that has happened to me on a golf course was a shank. Not a regular shank though. I totally shanked a 90 yard pitch shot down hill. The ball hit the rocks spun back towards the target and rolled onto the green

I could try that shot a thousand times and it would never have made the green. (hitting in the rocks/mountain on purpose)

Well, both times playing with bignose ...

Last summer, on hole 3 at warrenton gc in MO, Bignose hit a 3 wood off the tee. He hit a horrible low fading toe shot that landed after about 80 yds ... and it bounced on the cart path. It kept bouncing down the cart path, over and over again. I don't know how the ball stayed on the cart path so long, but it ended up being a 270 yd shot in the fairway.

Well, that's his luck, now mine. Last fall at Bear Creek in MO, par 5 4th, which is a dog right. I try to play a fade off the tee, but hit a dead pull through the fairway. Have an unplayable lie in some mulch up against a boulder. Sign nearby says 'protected area, free drop from mulch in nearby rough'. So I save a shot by dropping where I would have without a penalty stroke. 2nd shot, I have to play a low bump n/ run under a tree branch. I play it exactly as I want, but instead of the ball landing in the rough, it bounces off the cart path and goes about 30 yds too far. Well there is a creek on this hole, and it looked like my shot was in it, but it happened to bounce across the bridge. 3rd shot I hit a little fat and onto the fringe. 4th shot putt is about 7 ft left of the hole. Severe left to right slope on the putt for par, and I hit it a little fast and low, and it does a 270, lipping around and coming completeley out of the hole and sits on the green ... then about 2 tenths of a second later decides to fall in the hole. Routine par. In all fairness, should have been an 8, but I got a par.

Most of my stories involves one of my friends, who's not a good golfer, hitting on, or telling someone else to hit on the cart girls.

The most memorable was in Lake of the Ozarks, he says, "whoever gets the worst score on this hole, has to pull the polar bear pickup line on the cart lady next time we see her."

It's a short par 3, and me and my little cousin were pretty confident that my friend, Mark, would be the one losing. My cousin shanks his ball into the woods, and mark goes up, skulls it, off the cart path hits the side of the hill, goes straight up in the air and lands about 20 feet from the hole. Me and Mark end up making par, and my cousin makes double bogey.

We see the cart lady on the next hole, and she's a good 8 years older than my cousin most likely, so she asks us if we need anything and my cousin delivers a stellar polar bear line.

"Hey we had a question we've been arguing about for a long time, think you could help us out? We've been wondering how much a polar bear weighs,They say it's like 2000 but I don't think that's right What do you think"

"I don't know, maybe like a 1000? Why how much do you think it weighs?"

"Enough to break the ice, I'm Nathan, what's your name?'

She then laughed and said "awwww that's cute" and gave us some free drinks and drove away. It's a legendary story inside my family, my mom and dad thought it was just the funniest thing they've ever heard.

Ha! I think i may put the "polar bear" bet in effect on Monday when we go. My luck though, it will be me losing. I'll let u know.

If I wasn't already married, the "polar bear" would be my new #1 pick-up line.

Hmmm...probably a good thing I'm already married.

Haha I'm glad you guys enjoyed it, it always get a laugh, or at the very least a smile. I look forward to hearing some Polar Bear pickups in the future :)